What Are Obsessions in Pure OCD?

Let’s go back to basics, Pure OCD is a mental disorder about obsessions and compulsions – it’s a well-named illness to be fair. What then, is an obsession?

“an idea or thought that continually preoccupies or intrudes on a person’s mind”

Let’s take this step by step. An obsession is “an idea or thought”. Think about that, we’re dealing purely with ideas or thoughts. Very interesting. I’d argue that you can’t be obsessed therefore with say shoes. You could have an obsession over the fear of viruses (an idea or thought), causing the compulsion to relentlessly clean your shoes. You could have an obsession with order (again, an idea or thought) and a compulsion to arrange your shoes in a particular way. You could have an obsession with completeness (again, an idea or thought) and need to own every colourway of Nike Air Max 95s. There’s no end to how physical objects, let’s say shoes, become the conduit in which obsessions – an idea or thought – manifests themselves through.

How do I know if I’m obsessive?

To continue then, an obsession is an idea or thought…yes… “that continually preoccupies or intrudes on a person’s mind”. Obsessions are continuous, meaning they don’t stop, they are infinite in their ability to preoccupy a person’s mind. If I bought my partner some Christian Louboutin shoes for Christmas, she’d probably (I’d hope!) be very pleased, but it’s not possible to be continually preoccupied endlessly with them. She might be broadly smiling minutes after, in a good mood for hours after; hell, she might be jumping for joy all bloody day. Inevitably, sooner or later, the mind will very, very, easily find other things to be drawn to.

Think how strange it would be if that wasn’t true. “Enjoying your turkey dear?” “Sorry did you say something about shoes?”. The point is, no matter how hard she tried to focus on the happiness the shoes created, the happiness would very quickly be displaced by other thoughts, both positive and negative. Obsessions are the opposite, they are all-consuming, and sufferers find it impossible (before treatment) for anything else to displace these thoughts. Yet, we want the shoes to do exactly that – we want to buy happiness in effect – but it’s impossible. The choice isn’t up to us.

Why you can’t be a little bit OCD

In the reverse of how we want nice things to make us happy forever, we equally want our Pure OCD themes to never return. Unlike nice things like designer shoes, our obsessions have endless power to consume our consciousness. We can’t turn these obsessions off despite really trying – yet the things that we try to consciously focus on, in an attempt to make us happy, can’t hold our attention for long.

This is why if you think you’re a little bit OCD, the good news is, you’re not. You can’t dip in and out of obsessions. You could think you’re a little bit obsessed with designer shoes because you spend too much time browsing Vogue, but if you can then say, clean your teeth without needing to read the magazine, you’re (thankfully) not obsessed.

What’s the difference between obsession and addiction?

If you literally are reading Vogue all day, even on the toilet, then you’re still probably not suffering from Pure OCD. You’re more likely an addict. That’s OK! Addictions have bad PR! We’re all addicted to things. Of course, some addictions are much more detrimental than others, and some addicts show much greater dependency than others. The difference between obsession and addiction is that addiction is based on pleasure, whereas obsessions are based on the avoidance of psychological harm. Addictions can often lead to a huge amount of psychological harm too, but it’s important not to conflate the two to avoid confusion. It’s also crucial to recovery from Pure OCD that although obsessions are based around the avoidance of psychological harm, they in fact themselves, cause a huge amount of psychological harm!

Let me admit a dark personal tale of drug abuse. I’m addicted to crisps. I have a strong urge to eat crisps several times a day and usually do. Why? Because I’m addicted to salt, flavourings and god knows what else goes into Monster Munch. Why? Because all these things bring me great pleasure of sorts. I love Monster Munch so much I should be their brand ambassador…and a good job of it I would do to, if a passion for the product was the criteria for success.

It’s not like I’m proud of my current Monster Munch eating habits. If there was a magic wand I’d change for the better by eating only grilled chicken and broccoli, and maintain a morning running routine. The truth is; regardless of hypothetical wands, there’s nothing to stop me doing those things and getting into great shape. But I don’t, I choose Monster Munch. Even so, I’m not obsessed with crisps, despite having Pure OCD (about many other things).

Monster Munch probably crosses my mind every day, but it’s not gripping my consciousness like a vice. Also, I love my Monster Munch, but I hate my obsessions. If you’re loving whatever it is you think might be an obsession, it isn’t an obsession. If it’s something ultimately harmful yet pleasurable, it’s an addiction. If it’s something pleasurable yet not harmful, let’s say a novel “you can’t put down”, it’s a keen interest. If you’re continuously reading novels so much that you’ve stopped going to work and cleaning your teeth, then your keen interest has turned into an addiction.

Where does the word obsession come from?

The English word obsession comes directly from the Latin word ‘obsessĭo’ which means ‘siege’. Again, let’s look at the definition of siege in detail:

“the act or process of surrounding and attacking a fortified place in such a way as to isolate it from help and supplies, for the purpose of lessening the resistance of the defenders and thereby making capture possible”

That’s exactly how obsessions in Pure OCD behave, they ‘surround and attack’ a ‘fortified place’ i.e your consciousness. Why? To isolate ‘from help and supplies’. This is why obsessions can’t be just a ‘little bit’ because they, metaphorically speaking, surround you, they don’t stand just in front of you and form an orderly queue. Also, the obsession is metaphorically like an invading army attacking from outside the fortified place (your consciousness). However, an addiction is more like a citizen going on a murderers rampage from within the castle walls. Additionally, obsessions can never be fun, the residents under siege aren’t having one big house party, they’re likely slowly starving to death.

Pure OCD is never fun

There is no fun element at all of being obsessed with the idea of becoming a serial rapist (unless you actually are one). There is a fun element of snorting cocaine. If I was a devout Muslim (which I’m not), there’s no fun element at all of being obsessed with the idea you’re not worthy of Allah’s affections and thus posthumous torment.

Monster Munch is different though, there is a fun element, the eating of the crisps. Sure there is a bad element, my waistline is a little bigger than it would otherwise have been. But that’s addictions, you’re drawn to something that gives pleasure, despite potential negative consequences. You pays your money and you makes your choice. You never get addicted to things that aren’t initially nice* – have you ever seen a kid addicted to broccoli? Both addictions and obsessions cause terrible psychological pain, but at least addictions have some kind of upside, at least in the short-term, not that I recommend starting one!

On the surface addictions and obsessions appear similar. They both involve behaviours which in an ideal world, the individual may like to stop, but for some reason feels unable to. Addictions can be horrible, obsessions are always horrible. They’re both potentially extremely destructive to mental and physical health to the point of suicide. Although alike in many ways, addictions and obsessions need very different approaches in order to be treated appropriately.

Footnotes

*I know people often become addicted to smoking even though they initially probably hated the taste; however, the “high” they initially felt wasn’t the nicotine or the taste but the abstract thrill of consuming contraband and the social capital it brings. The actual addiction to cigarettes themselves probably grew years later through nicotine dependence, underpinned by newly learnt social norms.